When did it become kosher on cable TV to say "asshole" without getting edited out? And "goddammit"? And as if this is Amsterdam, even "Jesus Christ"? I've heard them with increasing frequency in the holiest week of the year, and in places (and times) that aren't especially raunchy or gritty.

It's easy to blame "South Park" for taking the 10 p.m. plunge and risking the FCC's wrath - the agency's professed indifference to decency standards on pay TV is eroding - but I blame network legal departments for deciding that every show should lower its standards just because everyone's watching for nipples and awards outbursts on the dial. The cursing cabal seems to be focused on Comedy Central, FX and TBS, all owned by the biggest of Big Media.

Now "damn" is a pretty good swear word for broadcast and cable TV. It's what your Grandma says about the local Mexicans, what you say about that single-malt scotch, and doesn't invoke our Lord. We brought our standards down a little for "bitch," replacing the cartoonish "witch" and "fat cow," but we paired it with "bastard" to get over the sexism charge. As the first person at my evangelical school to use both in the campus paper, in the same sentence no less, I understand the impulse to be edgy. But as "South Park" taught us in the surprisingly moral episode with 200 utterances of "shit," cursing ceases to be meaningful (and it can be!) when it's used carelessly.

Thanks to midlife-crisis-era Jon Stewart, "douche" is now standard fare on just about any channel outside Hallmark and TBN. The middle finger is less often blurred. And God bless ABC Family for giving us "Cruel Intentions" during prime time, showing us how true love (barely) overcomes in-law sodomy. I can hear "dick" or its feminine counterpart in half a dozen places after 10 p.m. The F-word hasn't made it on the small screen before 1 a.m. (thanks for breaking that barrier too, CC!), but its half-edited, missing-chromosome cousin "F-in" is nearly as annoying. The other night, "Ocean's Eleven" on TBS replaced it with "hell" in the vault explosion scene, which counts as progress. Makes more sense than "heck," and feels better, like getting frenched by your girlfriend instead of bumping or pecking.

Of course I'm part of the problem by patronizing these shows that forsake creativity for ever-more-tedious "shocks." They're worth watching anyway. "Your illiteracy has screwed us again," from "It's Always Sunny in Philadelphia," is one of my favorite TV lines of the year. And the "13 Days of Christmas" promos on Comedy Central, using a black midget and white girls on a Christmas-themed '70s porn set, are my favorite parody since Bud Light's "Real American Heroes" and "Real Men of Genius" commercials. (Search for "13" in Comedy Central's video section.)

Hell, I'm watching "Harold and Kumar Go to White Castle" as I fulminate about Hollywood's moral sewer, and wishing they didn't cut the hot-chick farting contest scene. At least they left in Neil Patrick Harris (or "NPH" as Racist Cop calls him). For some reason, weed-based movies like this one and "Dude, Where's My Car?" just have masterful plots. There's even an awesome homage to the latter in the final minutes of H&K.

"OK, so you think this is just about the burgers, huh?" Well spoken, Kumar.